My dearest friend. . .
1965 - 2015
What can I say?
I'm brokenhearted. . .
You have been a true friend in the way that really is the essence of what being a true friend is.
When I got introvert and reclusive You would never let go. Eventhough many times I didn't take Your calls, You would call me again and again. Sometimes I wonder if it was that Camel song You loved so much which made You that way. Never Let Go.
We were like that You and I, we let the music and lyrics we listened to invade our life, we became what we liked.
You always listened to what was beautiful, melodic and full of light while I listened to the noisy, experimental and dark. In progressive rock we found the common grounds we couldn't find in classical music or punk rock. To paraphrase Jon Anderson's word on Chris Squire:
You were the elf to my orc, I was Eeyore to Your Winnie the Pooh.
I remember first time I heard You play and how You nailed that Camel song with Your bass playing. I had never heard a local musician play quite like that before. . . I guess I was a bit envious. I didn't know it then but it was a moment which would shape my life in so many ways. At a start we were more competitors than collaborators but it soon changed as we saw that we both strived for something more artistically profound. We became conspirators for better music. Did we succed? I don't know. . . it doesn't matter.
I'm so happy that I found a way out of my cage to visit You this summer, I'm so thankful for the friendship we had. I'm so sad it's over.
a „Hi“ to you, wherever you are. *Long time no see* would have been another suitable greeting - it’s been 15 years already, which have seemingly shrunken to a matter of minutes, since I’ve learned that you’re no longer there, realizing (or at least: trying to), that we won’t see each other again, not in this world, that is. And in this world we only met three times, but those were good, exciting and intense enough.
I remember very, very vividly that first tour we did, when I came up with this rather long-ish piece of lyrics. Quite a rant, that called for an equally heavy beat - and you came up with it in a matter of less than a minute….and that thing called “Science Fiction White Punk Trash Heaven”, which seemed almost as clunky as it’s title, took off, as I hoped it would: like a truly rocking rocket….driven forward by your rumbling, rodeo-like bassline, that took the whole of The Moor by it’s neck and through the sonic stratosphere. A wonderful memory, a great moment of creativity… and we were lucky to create quite a few of them, speaking to each other just through music….a very friendly form of telepathy. And you were a master at it, a truly welcoming character, inviting each and everyone to join in, even a complete non-instrumentalist like your’s truly. That’s the spirit.
We had planned to do something together, after that tour…you brought two tapes to Berlin, when you crashed at my place to see your most beloved YES… alas, shortly after, my life turned upside down and nothing came of it… one of those growing regrets, when that sucker called death has reached out once more - and, as he frequently does, in the completely wrong department.
Oh, and I couldn’t believe when you told me, that you’ve read *Lord of the Rings* six times. Or was it eight times? By now probably twelve or twenty - or you can sing it backwards already. Well, I always liked people with true obsessions.
Stefan, you were a good soul and a creative one too - what more and what better is there to say. Be good where you are, and surround yourself with your favourite musicians. And may a volume of Lord of the Rings be at your eternal hand.
It has taken a while. Well over a week to be precise. A week of clumsy attempts to take in, comprehend and come to terms with the fact that you are not with us anymore. Intellectually, I do understand, but emotionally I struggle. Big time. I know the struggle will go away eventually. It usually does. But right now I just don´t want to.
What an inspiring friend you were, always spreading a comfortable warmth around you, through your sense of humor, your unique way of viewing the world and off course through the fantastic music you composed. You included me to take part of the musical creation. And for you letting me, I'm immensely glad and very proud.
Goodbye my dear friend!
P.S. Valhalla, Heaven or Nangijala; celebrate, you have just received a wonderful addition! D.S.